a summ(er)ization

To elaborate on the events of the past two weeks would take hours -- literally -- and would open up a slew of wounds that have nearly healed. So I'm going to hit the high(and low)lights in bullet fashion:

Monday the 8th:

  • Packed up my desk and walked away from a project I loved
  • Went for drinks with Conspiring Co-worker/Friend (CCF) that quite with me & my T
  • Called another previous co-worker/friend to inquire about her husband's new project
  • Met friend/ex-hair dresser for dinner at cool new diner/bistro in Historic downtown
  • Answered countless calls & emails regarding my departure

Tuesday the 9th:

  • Made appointment about new project
  • Licked wounds, patted self on back, licked wounds
  • Avoided calls & emails regarding departure

Wednesday the 10th

  • First meeting with friend/project coordinator about new development
  • Spent the day walking around in a daze
  • Ignored calls & emails from curious people in the industry
  • Inform housekeeper that we'll likely have to cut back on her services for a while
  • Consoled crying housekeeper for an hour over shared coffee and Marlboro Lights
  • Told housekeeper to stay on schedule until further notice
  • Made promise to meet up with housekeeper (new friend) socially for drinks/coffee/

Thursday the 11th

  • Drove over to sister's beach place
  • Went to spa; had facial; got great (uber expensive) haircut
  • Spent way too much money on new shirt, cologne, sun glasses (therapy)
  • Went to a local bar; ran into a friend; drank way too many cocktails on empty stomach
  • Fell face first onto brick steps leading to house and fucked up face
  • Looked into mirror and realized that all my internal scars were external
  • Called T and had long overdue emotional (drunken) break down

Friday the 12th:

  • Woke up looking as bad as I felt -- bruised, battered, miserable
  • Got email from PP#2 -- very apologetic, flattering, and LONG OVERDUE
  • Called PP#1 aka CBWS -- now referred to as CFWI (Crazy Friend With Issues)
  • Made plans to meet CFWI for coffee the next week and settle 6 mo. of bullshit
  • T, Sister, and dog arrive at beach place

Saturday the 13th:

  • Return home late afternoon
  • Spent evening on phone with CCF discussing our plans for the future

Sunday the 14th:

  • Mother's Day lunch with mom, sister, brother-in-law, & T
  • Emotional well being back to 100%

Tuesday the 16th:

  • Positive phone conference with PP#2 - agreed to complete 2 personal projects for him
  • Lunch with a friend
  • Productive therapy session at Macy's and Dillard's clearance racks (saved $800)
  • Met CFWI at Starbuck's for coffee and "The Talk"
  • Two hours later hugged CFWI good-bye (Yes, we hugged) and left with resolve & peace
  • Received email requesting 2nd meeting regarding possible new project

Wednesday the 15th:

  • Organized office, files, closets
  • successful and super-positive meeting regarding new project

Friday the 19th:

  • Yard work, played with dog, enjoying feeling 100% back to normal (whatever that is) again
  • Dinner with friends and then saw The Davinci Code (very well done IMHO)

Saturday the 20th - Monday the 23rd:

  • Scabs from tripping on brick steps finally fall off -- look human again
  • Set up 3rd meeting with new project (today at 10:00)
  • Spent entire day researching college classes
  • Ordered transcripts from previous college
  • Bought umbrella for patio table and re-potted all outdoor potted plants
  • Watched TV, played computer games, organized home office
  • Fully recovered emotionally to begin making future career decisions
  • Reaffirmed that leaving the project was the best thing I could have done FOR ME
  • Decided that this dry, hot, Florida weather is just too fucking miserable
  • Will develop and set into motion a plan to move to a place more comfortable -- eventually

So that about sums it all up. I'm feeling great and looking forward to the 10:oo project meeting. I have a lot of questions that need to be answered and definite terms written into the contract before I agree to accept the position.

Through all of this I've learned that the deaths of my Chow - Nikki, my aunt, and my brother have made me hypersensative to my environment. I've also learned that I am not going to settle for anything less than what makes me 100% happy. I won't be walking into another situation that isn't completely healthy for my emotional well-being and I am not going to jump into anything without completely (over) analyzing the pros vs. cons. Life is just too damn short.

From here on out I am doing what's best for me. I'll keep you posted.

Hugs & kisses!



Fightin' Mad Mary said...

"I am not going to settle for anything less than what makes me 100% happy." I LOVE THAT!! I am going to say this to myself everyday...We could all use this mindset.

With so many changes in your life right now, your blog has been a great read. You are taking us all along for the ride and you should know we support you 100%!

cola boy said...

Wow! You ahve been through a lot lately, Pookie. Hang in there and keep us updated. I hope that 100% comes to you soon. :-)

Sangroncito said...

Go for what makes you happy and what works for you. Hugs, Sango.

doris said...

Awwwww. Hugs and pat on the back and well done you survivor and winner you!

I love the "Macy's and Dillard's" therapy session. If you saved that much I wonder how much it cost!!

Pookie65 said...

You guys are just awesome. I've said it before and will say it again -- If I could give every one of you a hug I would. I really feel blessed to have so many good folks around the globe rooting for me.

The "News" is in my next update :-)
Then I hope to be drama free for a long, long time.

Badaunt said...

This is such a wonderful blog entry. It's like a roller coaster ride. Whee!

Was I allowed to laugh when you fell flat on your face, or was that rude? It sounds SO MUCH like the sort of thing I'd do...

(And was picking the scabs off fun?)