Toilet Scare

Surprise your friends!
Sex Education

Vintage film from decades ago.



Low class people at Walmart
Betty Butterfield - Private Thoughts

If it wadn't for all these cats I'd kill myself!
Betty Butterfield - War in Iraq

Soldiers comes home and they beats their wives
Betty Butterfield - Death on the Commode

"She squarshed down too hard and her heart stopped..."


the next generation of wedding songs perhaps

Perhaps this song will replace "Time in a Bottle"?

"My Humps" - The Black Eyed Peas

What you gon' do with all that junk?
All that junk inside your trunk?I'ma get, get, get, get, you drunk,
Get you love drunk off my hump.
My hump, my hump, my hump, my hump, my hump,
My hump, my hump, my hump, my lovely little lumps. (Check it out)

I drive these brothers crazy,
I do it on the daily,
They treat me really nicely,
They buy me all these ices.
Dolce & Gabbana,Fendi and NaDonna
Karan, they be sharin'
All their money got me wearin' fly
But I ain't askin,
They say they love my ass ‘n,
Seven Jeans, True Religion's,
I say no, but they keep givin'
So I keep on takin'
And no I ain't taken
We can keep on datin'
I keep on demonstrating.

My love, my love, my love, my love
You love my lady lumps,
My hump, my hump, my hump,
My humps they got u,
She's got me spending.
(Oh) Spendin' all your money on me and spending time on me.
She's got me spendin'.
(Oh) Spendin' all your money on me, up on me, on me

What you gon' do with all that junk?
All that junk inside that trunk?
I'ma get, get, get, get, you drunk,
Get you love drunk off my hump.
What u gon' do with all that ass?
All that ass inside them jeans?
I'm a make, make, make, make you scream
Make u scream, make you scream.
Cos of my hump, my hump, my hump, my hump.
My hump, my hump, my hump, my lovely lady lumps. (Check it out)

I met a girl down at the disco.
She said hey, hey, hey yea let's go.
I could be your baby, you can be my honey
Let's spend time not money.
I mix your milk wit my cocoa puff,
Milky, milky cocoa,
Mix your milk with my cocoa puff, milky, milky riiiiiiight.

They say I'm really sexy,
The boys they wanna sex me.
They always standing next to me,
Always dancing next to me,
Tryin' a feel my hump, hump.
Lookin' at my lump, lump.
U can look but you can't touch it,
If you touch it I'ma start some drama,
You don't want no drama,
No, no drama, no, no, no, no drama
So don't pull on my hand boy,
You ain't my man, boy,
I'm just tryn'a dance boy,
And move my hump.

My hump, my hump, my hump, my hump,
My hump, my hump, my hump, my hump, my hump, my hump.
My lovely lady lumps (lumps)
My lovely lady lumps (lumps)
My lovely lady lumps (lumps)
In the back and in the front (lumps)
My lovin' got u,
She's got me spendin'.
(Oh) Spendin' all your money on me and spending time on me.
She's got me spendin'.
(Oh) Spendin' all your money on me, up on me, on me.

What you gon' do with all that junk?
All that junk inside that trunk?
I'ma get, get, get, get you drunk,
Get you love drunk off my hump.
What you gon' do with all that ass?
All that ass inside them jeans?
I'ma make, make, make, make you scream
Make you scream, make you scream.
What you gon do with all that junk?
All that junk inside that trunk?
I'ma get, get, get, get you drunk,
Get you love drunk off this hump.
What you gon' do wit all that breast?
All that breast inside that shirt?
I'ma make, make, make, make you work
Make you work, work, make you work.

She's got me spendin'.
Spendin all your money on me and spendin' time on me
She's got me spendin'.
Spendin' all your money on me, up on me, on me.
Betty Butterfield - Middle Age

Better Living Through Chemistry
Betty Butterfield - Hormone Therapy

"Well, cause I'm growing hair I've never growed places before."



This is too damn cute. And that boy in the red shorts is just adorable.

strange lyrics

Famous Blue Raincoat - Leonard Cohen. If you want to hear a most etheral version of this song check out Judy Collins Sings Leonard Cohen: Democracy .

It's four in the morning, the end of December
I'm writing you now just to see if you're better
New York is cold, but I like where I'm living
There's music on Clinton Street all through the evening.

I hear that you're building your little house deep in the desert
You're living for nothing now, I hope you're keeping some kind of record.

Yes, and Jane came by with a lock of your hair
She said that you gave it to her
That night that you planned to go clear
Did you ever go clear?

Ah, the last time we saw you you looked so much older
Your famous blue raincoat was torn at the shoulder
You'd been to the station to meet every train
And you came home without Lili Marlene

And you treated my woman to a flake of your life
And when she came back she was nobody's wife.
Well I see you there with the rose in your teeth
One more thin gypsy thief

Well I see Jane's awake --

She sends her regards.
And what can I tell you my brother, my killer
What can I possibly say?
I guess that I miss you, I guess I forgive you
I'm glad you stood in my way.

If you ever come by here, for Jane or for me
Your enemy is sleeping, and his woman is free.

Yes, and thanks, for the trouble you took from her eyes
I thought it was there for good so I never tried.

And Jane came by with a lock of your hair
She said that you gave it to her
That night that you planned to go clear

Sincerely, L. Cohen


Betty Butterfield Dinner Date

No, I'm not ok....How are you?


Just call me 432-A

Guess who spent Sunday & Monday in the hospital? Sunday morning and T and I had just got to the church parking lot when my chest started hurting/tightening/tingling/crushing. Long story short we ended up going to the ER of one of the hospitals. Many EKG's, CS, blood tests, Parenteral Beta-blockers, nitroglycerine patches, and a day & 1/2 later I found It was basically all written off as Arrhythmia and my good fortune to have come in before any damage was done to my heart. Ain't that the shit? Oh, yea it was probably brought on by stress. Imagine that.

So I am on day 3+ of no smoking. I'm now associating cigarettes to spending the night in a hospital and that's made it much easier for me to resist smoking. So far so good. One minute I feel like being a complete bitch and the next I am OK.

Seeing as I was in the hospital on Monday I ended up signing all my paperwork for the new project on Tuesday. Yeah for me. I am officially working again. The first meeting is on the 19th and I'm very much looking forward to it.

I just read where the Senate has once again told Bush & Co. they weren't supporting his little marriage amendment. So basically 49% of those elected "decision makers" have found that there are more important things to worry about gay marriage. Regarding the other 48% I am so fucking sick and tired of these homophobic, small minded, right wing assholes using my relationship to detract attention from THEIR fucking war and how bad their boy has fucked up this country. Truly, if a majority Americans are stupid enough or so weak minded as to elect another radical Republican government in 2008 then I really don't want to live here any more. Let the mindless sheep, the bible thumpers, and the good ole boys have it. I'll take my 2nd class, hell-bound ass somewhere else to live.

Anyway, so that's my update for today. I'm thinking of hitting the movies and need to get showered. Hope everyone has a great day!


Quiet morning

I'm sitting here working on cup number 3 of my coffee and enjoying the silence that is my home this time of day. T and the dog are still sleeping -- big surprise. The dog is getting to be as bad about staying in bed all day as T is! And me? Well, I do good to stay in bed past 6:30am. In fact that is sleeping in for me.

So over the past few days I managed to put some of my pent up boredom to good use and do a mini-makeover in the living room. With T's help I moved my antique piano and a few other of the larger pieces of furniture around. Then I painted one of the walls a deep Sage green (same paint that is in the built in niche area over the fireplace and two other decorative niche areas. It looks really good --- now. When I first did it I had this huge gray-green wall that was the same color as the couch and none of my art "popped" against it. BORING. So this meant that I had to strip the room of all paintings and mirrors and re-hang everything. Even then it was still blaghhhhhh. So off I went to Ross for that sumthin-sumthin that would bring the whole room together. Well, I found a few things and after some whole house switching around got the room looking pretty damn good. Years ago I loved to redecorate and rearrange furniture. But now it's like a chore. Overall I'm pretty pleased. My goal was to make the large open space (kitchen, dining, foyer, living room, halls) feel like a well-defined loft and I believe I've succeeded. Yeah for me!

So we are going back to church again to the local UCC this morning. We went last week and liked it enough to plan another visit. Perhaps this will be our new church home. Who knows. I do like the fact that the doctrine follows very closely my own beliefs and that the minister hits home with his message in under 20 minutes. No long winded sermons at this UCC.

I sign the paperwork for the new project in the morning and that really excites me. In my last post I made it pretty clear how bored and restless I'd become just sitting around doing nothing. For the first week it was awesome but then it started driving me crazy. By noon Monday I will be gainfully employed again and still receiving another 12 checks from the last project. Yippee for me that money isn't going to be too big of an issue while waiting on the new project to get rolling. I made some pretty good investments last year and we typically pay 3-6 months ahead on our major bills (mortgage, insurance, HOA fees, taxes, lawn service, housekeeping etc...) so at least I don't worry about any nasty large bills showing up. The older I get the more I realize that it's not about money -- it's about happiness and satisfaction in what you are doing with yourself. Of course money is necessary for shelter, food, etc... but I have no desire to be rich per se I just want to be happy. Hopefully the new job will fulfill that part of my life.

Also I am going to try and stop smoking in the morning so I have two exciting this happening tomorrow. Mentally I've been building myself up for this and I think I'm ready. We'll see if I can do it.

Following the premise of one of my fave bloggers, Fightin' Mad Mary, I'm going to do a product review (bashing). Today I am going to tell you what I really think about Miracle-Gro Moisture Control Potting Mix. It sucks. I'm one of these consumers willing to spend more for something that promises to deliver. Well this product does not. Not only does it not retain moisture it actually dries out faster than the potting mix from Target for $1.99 per 8lb bag. And my plants did not grow twice as large as promised by the company -- they all died from drying out so quickly. My advice is to save yourself about $6.00 per bag and buy the store brand instead.

That's all folks. Pookie has to get ready for church.


Bungalow fever strikes

Since May 8th I've basically been unemployed. For those regular readers of my blog you know that this is by my own choice but on the off chance someone new pops by then scroll down and catch up.

While I've enjoyed having the time off I've now reached the point that I am going stir-crazy. One can only see so many movies...watch so many hours of TV...work in the gardens just so long before it comes tedious. Well, I am definitely there. I cannot wait to get back to work.

This coming Monday I will sign all the paper work for the new project and I hope to immediately jump into months of countless meetings, design sessions, and market research. I welcome the challenges and hard work ahead. Hell, I welcome ANYTHING to do! Just to show you how bored I've become I'll share some of my exciting "accomplishments" from the past 3+ weeks:
  • set up online bill paying and paid one bill
  • spent countless hours watching the real-time stock ticker from Scott Trade
  • watched by-the-second as my positions went WAY down and then creeped slowly back up
  • learned that the guy who does my highlights has moved (WTF?)
  • realized that since the new haircut I have no highlights and need to find a new hair dresser
  • did a home facial: Grape seed extract & Tea tree (not all it's cracked up to be)
  • spent and average of $100 a day at Publix re-stocking the pantry and freezer for 10 years
  • made at least 25 trips to Lowe's for gardening supplies
  • smoked 1.5 packs of cigs a day --- knowing that I plan to quit by June 9th
  • established June 9th as the day to officially give up cigs
  • made a point to shower before 4pm (anything later would be downright lazy)
  • changed out my computer key board
  • cleaned out my office closet
  • took and had my car washed & detailed
  • drank coffee with the housekeeper
  • went out to dinner 15 times with friends
  • took 30 Xenical capsules to offset high-fat meals
  • drank lots of coffee
  • changed light bulbs in most lamps to the new mini-fluorescent bulbs
  • brushed the dog
  • took naps with the dog
  • teased & tormented the dog by taking his toys and running from him
  • flossed teeth 17 times
  • changed the ring tone on phone
  • changed desk-top background on PC --- three times
  • spent countless hours doing mundane things to pass the time

This morning it hit me that I just can't wait until Monday. Between now and then I am going to work on a new marketing plan and make the list-from-hell of topics for the first team meeting. I just hope that my pent up enthusiasm and energy will convince my new team that I'm completely insane. The truth is that they may be right.