I Do Solemnly Swear

That unlike some people I am going to do my very best to accomplish all the things I've been putting off. I will make an assertive effort to complete the following tasks with dignity, honor, and resolve. I maintain that I will not intentionally mislead, lie to, harm, or deceive anyone as I strive to achieve my goals. Thank you and God Bless America.

1) Get my ass to the gym 4 times this week and every week there after. We leave in less than 3 weeks for our cruise and if I don't lose 10 pounds it's not going to be a pretty sight poolside with me in bathing trunks.

2) Get a one month membership to a tanning salon. Yes, Jay, I mean the kind with sun beds. I know I fuss at you for tanning all the time but if I don't get a base tan before we leave I'll not be able to perch myself on a floating beach mat in the Bahamas for an entire day without burning.

3) Register for my online continuing education and complete the course. I have to have my certificate by March 31st and I need to get this out of the way.

4) Bite the bullet and send in the dues for a 2006 membership to ASID. I don't need to join ASID but I'm a whore for the little credentials and I'm eligible for membership so why not?

5) Write a scathing editorial to my local newspaper about what a crappy job the county commission as a whole is doing. This is going to be a tough one because I'm friends with two of the commissioners. Perhaps I should call them and forewarn them?

6) Go to Cooks.com and pick out a menu for the dinner party T and I are having Saturday night. I want (need) to try something new. I suppose actually shopping for said dinner party would be nice too.

7) Make a hair appointment. My most recent highlights are still awesome but I'm ready for something a little shorter (spikier maybe?) and easier to do. Basically I don't want to spend more than 5 minutes on my hair. It's time for a change.

8) Call my accountant and then send off my 4th quarter 2005 tax bill. God I hate doing this. Especially since I know I'll have to write another damn check come April 15th. Guess I can't bitch too much as I made a lot more last year than I expected.

9) Call my friend Jennifer and apologize for not making her New Year's Eve party.

10) Post at least one comment on every single one of my favorite blogger's sites. This shouldn't be too hard as I always have something to say no matter how banal or outrageous. It's simply a matter of prioritizing and making the time for my buddies.

Well, folks that's my contribution to the blog world for the morning. I hope everyone has a great and productive day.

ps...I've added two fabulous new women to my fave blog list: Fightin' Mad Mary and Badaunt. Talk about sassy ladies with something to say! Mary has the best profile picture in the world and Badaunt has the kind of dry wit that makes grown men grab their testicles in fear. And, be sure and check out the first part of Scotty's review of Brokeback Mountain. It's one of the best I've seen.