I Do Solemnly Swear

That unlike some people I am going to do my very best to accomplish all the things I've been putting off. I will make an assertive effort to complete the following tasks with dignity, honor, and resolve. I maintain that I will not intentionally mislead, lie to, harm, or deceive anyone as I strive to achieve my goals. Thank you and God Bless America.

1) Get my ass to the gym 4 times this week and every week there after. We leave in less than 3 weeks for our cruise and if I don't lose 10 pounds it's not going to be a pretty sight poolside with me in bathing trunks.

2) Get a one month membership to a tanning salon. Yes, Jay, I mean the kind with sun beds. I know I fuss at you for tanning all the time but if I don't get a base tan before we leave I'll not be able to perch myself on a floating beach mat in the Bahamas for an entire day without burning.

3) Register for my online continuing education and complete the course. I have to have my certificate by March 31st and I need to get this out of the way.

4) Bite the bullet and send in the dues for a 2006 membership to ASID. I don't need to join ASID but I'm a whore for the little credentials and I'm eligible for membership so why not?

5) Write a scathing editorial to my local newspaper about what a crappy job the county commission as a whole is doing. This is going to be a tough one because I'm friends with two of the commissioners. Perhaps I should call them and forewarn them?

6) Go to Cooks.com and pick out a menu for the dinner party T and I are having Saturday night. I want (need) to try something new. I suppose actually shopping for said dinner party would be nice too.

7) Make a hair appointment. My most recent highlights are still awesome but I'm ready for something a little shorter (spikier maybe?) and easier to do. Basically I don't want to spend more than 5 minutes on my hair. It's time for a change.

8) Call my accountant and then send off my 4th quarter 2005 tax bill. God I hate doing this. Especially since I know I'll have to write another damn check come April 15th. Guess I can't bitch too much as I made a lot more last year than I expected.

9) Call my friend Jennifer and apologize for not making her New Year's Eve party.

10) Post at least one comment on every single one of my favorite blogger's sites. This shouldn't be too hard as I always have something to say no matter how banal or outrageous. It's simply a matter of prioritizing and making the time for my buddies.

Well, folks that's my contribution to the blog world for the morning. I hope everyone has a great and productive day.

ps...I've added two fabulous new women to my fave blog list: Fightin' Mad Mary and Badaunt. Talk about sassy ladies with something to say! Mary has the best profile picture in the world and Badaunt has the kind of dry wit that makes grown men grab their testicles in fear. And, be sure and check out the first part of Scotty's review of Brokeback Mountain. It's one of the best I've seen.


The Dangerous Man said...

Naughty naughty Pookie. How many times have you told me that I shouln't go on the sunbeds, but now you are doing it yourself! I ought to spank you! ;-)

I know what you mean about accomlishing things. the trouble with me is that i start things but never finish them.

I was watching TV the other day and Dr. Hillary from GMTV has gave me the answer!
By following his advice I have finally found inner peace. Dr. Hillary proclaimed the way to achieve inner peace is to finish all the things you have started.

So... I looked around my apartment to see things I've started and haven't finished; and before leaving the home this morning I finished off a bottle of Merlot, a bottle of Goldschlager, a bottle of Bailey's, a bottle of Famous Grouse, a package of Bacon, the remainder of both Prozac and Valium packets I found in the Toilets of Cruz 101 the other night, the rest of the Angel Delight, some Herbal Tea and a packet of Minstrels.

I feel over the moon, well in the clouds at least!

(only joking... I don't like Herbal Tea)

Pookie65 said...

I love what you've accomplished today so far. I've a nice splash or two of vodka and some Appletini mix that I should finish off -- strictly medicinal of course.

Yes, Jay, I am going to tan. But only for a month. I know even a month is bad for me but if it keeps me from "burning" in the real sun then.... I still want you to try a nice spray tan sometime. It lasts a whole week and is alot better for you.

Anyway you cheeky monkey thanks for posting.


ProfessorGQ said...

good luck on the resolutions...one of these days, I will make mine

Scotty said...

Resolutions...SUCK! Thanks for the shout out! Glad you liked the review. The saga continues!

Fightin' Mad Mary said...

Pookie65 You are a doll! Thanks for the mention.

I have a confession - I use tanning beds too! Only for special occasions though. Then I follow up with a fake tan lotion one of my favorites is Decleor Paris Auto-Bronzant Self Tanning Hydrating Emulsion. It has a SPF of 4 - so you can prevent a burn while you self tan!

Sangroncito said...

A worthy list of resolutions! I hope you accomplish all of them (although easy on the sun bed).
hugs from Brazil, Sango